Give Yourself a Break!

I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly.

~Buckminster Fuller

Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why are we so quick so self-criticize and so slow to give ourselves a break? What beliefs have we learned that cause us to keep repeating this pattern of being hard on ourselves? They aren’t beliefs that you want to hang onto if you plan on creating a life you love.

Because an energy of being hard on yourself, is not an energy of allowing.

If you’ve been with me for any time at all—then you know I am all about the power of choice. And using that power to help us live better lives—live that are beautiful and energetically RICH. And “better” is really something that we have to define on our own terms, right? What does a better life mean to you? More time with your family + friends? More travel? More money? Better health? A more satisfying career? What is it for you? I know it seems like a little thing, but it’s often the little things that have the biggest impact on our lives. So for today, think about what would make life better for you.  And then think about all the ways you may beat yourself up a little bit for not having those things. Maybe you want to drop 10 pounds and feel more healthy—but you can’t seem to find the time to make it to the gym and the ice cream seems to have some sort of evil spell on you—so you beat yourself up for not doing it “better.” Being hard on yourself about eating the ice cream, or not making it the gym—isn’t going to help you get closer to what you want. Instead of getting yourself into a tizzy about it try to— Let go of feeling like you aren’t doing it right.

Let go of the guilt and the shoulds, woulds and coulds.
 
Eat the ice cream without guilt. Find time to go to the gym—or not.

But if not, don’t beat yourself up about it. Change your energy about it—or go. If you want to have a life that truly FEELS better to you, then you gotta start with not beating yourself up for not being where you want to be. You get where you want to be—faster and with much less struggle—by being easy on yourself and choosing things that support your bigger visions. And baby step by baby step, bit by bit—you’ll get there. And then once you’re there—you’ll discover new, exciting crazy new adventures you want to add to your list. The overall gist?

Enjoy the journey. And be easy on yourself along the way.

Big blessings, Carrie

When It’s Good to be Bad

When It’s Good to be Bad

Evolve. Grow. Be your best self.  Find your purpose. Live your dreams. Make it happen. Just do it. Reach for the top.

good-to-be-bad

I see the value in all of the above words and concepts, Yet, I do think there are times we just need to play hooky from it all.  

Don’t you sometimes just need a break?

To chill out and just bask in the beauty and brilliance of  doing nothing.  

Can we let go of having to do, do, do and just be, be, be?

If doing nothing doesn’t float your boat, then what about just stepping away from things that feel heavy, like a weight on your shoulders, boring, dull, or time wasting—for a bit?

And, please hear this loud and clear—I don’t advocate truly being “bad” or walking away from important responsibilities.

That is not my point. 

My point is, we often feel bad for not liking things we are taught we should like. We place pressure on ourselves to fit a mold, do things a certain way or “measure up.” 

Yuk!  I say play hooky from that thought. 

We feel like we are bad or wrong if we take a break from these things, create boundaries, or completely walk away from things that don’t light our fire.

It’s not bad to play hooky at times. In some circumstance, it might be the best thing for you.

Or, another way of saying this is—take a break from the things that you don’t enjoy and add more of things you do enjoy into your life.

I’m not talking about the scrubbing of the toilet and paying bills. I am talking about the ways in which we settle for less than we know we deserve.

I am talking about those times, when your soul needs a break—even if you or others see it as being bad.

Give that to yourself.

It’s important to take a look at the times you do feel like playing hooky, or escaping. If your instinct is to run away, to leave, to hide and to lie to get out of having to do something, then you should examine why you are doing that thing in the first place.

If something causes us pain, discomfort and misery in life . . . why are we still doing it?  

Why do we persist in jobs we don’t like, relationships that are harmful or negative and why do we allow things in our life that make us unhappy?

I am suggesting you try to find a way . . . even if its just on an emotional level, to take a break from those things. 

 

Yes, there is value in hard work personal challenges and working through struggles, but not as the dominant theme in our lives.

Not if it makes you feel burdened, tired, bored, stressed, overwhelmed on a regular basis.

That is natures way of saying—play hooky from this thing you are forcing yourself to do.

It’s not that it’s bad to give yourself a break. It’s that we’ve been trained to feel that feeling good is bad—in certain circumstances.

Find a way to play hooky from the things that are bringing you down in life and say yes to that which feeds your soul.

It’s ok to just enjoy. To just be.

Leave a comment below and let me know how you feel about this. In what area of your life do you need to give yourself a break?

Merci.

xxoo

Carrie Jolie 

 

 

Choose You—Guilt Free

Choose You—Guilt Free

Choose you. What’s the first thing you think when you read this?

That’s selfish. I already do choose me. I am not even sure what she’s talking about. I don’t have time. I don’t need to. That’s rubbish!

Any of those ring true for you?

I thought I was choosing me, but when I really took a good look at it, I actually put everyone else before me. I would drop anything in a heartbeat for those I loved. I would put things that were my passions and soul callings to the side to help others. I was brilliant at self-sacrifice.

I thought it was selfish and uncaring it I didn’t.

I mean, they need me.  They need you too, right? I mean the dishes have to get done, the kids need driving, and the partner needs help. You have to help them. It’s your job.

Or, is it?

Let’s get really real here. Do you really need to drop everything for everyone else? How about putting what matters to you in the lead, at times? I am not suggesting dropping your responsibilities. I am just urging you to realize this is your life and you only have a certain number of days here. So . . .

Let’s make it matter.

Leave your mark. Sing. Be happy. Go skinny-dipping. Play with your kids. Write that book. Paint that painting. Play your piano. Hug more. Eat the cake—guilt free.

You can, CHOOSE YOU, and still be there for others, live your truth and be fulfilled. Be carefree and easy about it.

Peace. 

xxo

Carrie 

 

How to Overcome the “Not-Enough” Voice

How to Overcome the “Not-Enough” Voice

Ever feel like there is just not enough to go around? Or that there are already enough people doing what you love, so what’s the point? Or that you just don’t have what it takes?

overcome-not-enough-voice

For me, when I started coaching, consulting and writing—I felt like I was drowning in a sea of amazing coaches, entrepreneurs + online experts.

I was like “ what the heck (stronger adjective) how can I compete with these amazing, established entrepreneurs?”

I should just give up.  That’s what I started feeling like.

Can you relate?

Ever think that there just isn’t enough to go around? Like there are too many successful people in your area of expertise, you are too far behind, there aren’t enough client, time, money or resources?

I feel ya! I was there many times and thank goodness, I didn’t give into that pesky little voice of self –sabotage.

Don’t give up.

Guess what? Not feeling good enough is one of the most common feelings—it’s like a plague.  And it doesn’t just magically go away when you have money, success + love. I have had numerous conversations with very successful entrepreneurs and coaches and they all say they still have this “not good enough” feeling creep in on occasion.

When that thought come up, here is what you do:

  • Slap yourself! What the heck? You are amazing, aren’t you? Then stop it! Stop beating yourself up (ok, don’t slap yourself)
  • Now give yourself a big hug for just recognizing that you feel this way. Seeing it and acknowledging it, is the first step in handling this little monster of self-doubt.
  • Sit down and give yourself the gift of uninterrupted quiet space—no computer, e-mail, iPhone, kids, etc. Take 5 for you.
  • Now make a list of your accomplishments. I know it seems simple and kind of weird, but do it anyway.  Take some time to appreciate all the hings you have accomplished.
  • See your strengths.  Give yourself a little pat on the back.
  • Make a commitment to NOT allowing this voice of self-doubt and “not enough-ness” to run you.  Eyes on the prize.
  • Make a list of things you can do that make you feel good, expansive and abundant.
  • Choose to see all the abundance in the world. That there is enough for everyone and that you have something unique to offer the world. It’s in there.

Choice du jour:

“ I choose to release this voice of self doubt that tells me I am not enough and there is not enough to go around. The world is abundant. I am abundant. I allow all that is to manifest to me now.”

BIG HUG!!

Carrie Jolie Dale

This or something even more brilliant for the highest good of all concerned.