Sometimes getting clear about where we are in life can be a bit like ripping a band off super fast. It may hurt a little, you may make a funny face and afterwords—you’ll realize it wasn’t such a big hairy deal after all.
THE TRUH IS—happiness, health and wealth are choices.
You may think that statement is unrealistic, call me a dreamer, or my favorite—an idealist.
And let’s be clear before you virtually throw a book at me—I am not discounting that people have real problems.
People don’t have money—they grow up poor.
People are born with health issues that were clearly NOT their choice.
And there are people who, no matter how hard they try—can’t find happiness.
I agree—people have problems. I agree—life can be hard.
I agree—we don’t always get to choose what happens to us, the family we are born into, or our genetics.
I get that life can deal us a bad hand.
And what I also know—is that no matter what sort of shit storm life throws your way—you can still choose to be happy.
You can still choose to create wealth.
You can still choose to work towards being healthier, no matter what your genetics.
The point is—you can mold, shape and manifest (if you wanna get all spiritual) a life that feels better to you (or that is closer to your dream life) by simply learning to be way, way, way more choosy about your choices.
Here are some examples (and they work if you actually do them…so do them gosh darnit!)
Instead of feeling_____________ when I am driving and that person doesn’t use their turn signal, I choose to feel___________ (you are working towards putting something a bit more positive and good feeling in the second space)
Rather than thinking______________when my checking account balance is under $50, I will instead choose to think______________(you are aiming to come up with a feeling that is a slight improvement from the first feeling. If you truly feel panicked about not having enough money, you probably won’t force a feeling of total confidence about it. But you can find a thought/feeling that is a bit better than panic)
I could really tell that person to_______________ right now, but I will choose to think, do or say ____________because that is a better energy and I know (in the long run) this will raise my vibration and deliver boatloads of life goodies my way.
My back hurts, I will never lose this weight, my parents were like this, so I am stuck with it. Basically, my health is_________. And I also know that I co-create my reality with thoughts, feelings and actions, so if I truly want to be a health machine, I better change my thoughts, feelings and actions. I will work on feeling more___________about my health and come up with ways to support a healthy lifestyle rather than adding to the negative energy that perpetuates it.
*** so the idea here is to fill in the first blank with the actual thing you may feel in that instance. And the second or third blanks, you are reaching for a better thought or feeling. It does NOT have to be fake or forced, just a slight energetic improvement. And in the end, even if all this hocus-pocus manifesting stuff doesn’t work (I wholeheartedly DON’T believe that, because I am living, breathing proof it does) you will at least learn a method to feel a bit better when the going gets tough.
So fill in the blanks of your life with new, better feelings and thoughts. It really does work, but not if you only think about it here and there and get lazy pants about it.
If you want the change, you gotta change. You have to choose differently.
Rip that bandaid off and get it over with already!
p.s always cheering you on…..always.
Yes, that is me right there in front the Eiffel tower with my lovely daughters.
One of my bucket list items was to take them to France and Italy for a couple weeks and it was such an incredible experience.
I have a thing for France (I am there yearly) but this was my girls first time to get to experience the whole European thing.
It was truly a memory I will cherish FOREVER! (thank you God)
Some people may look at this and think “great, its easy for her . . . she has money” or “how self-serving” and even “that won’t ever happen for me.”
I so get this, because I used to think and say those things (and in fact, sometimes I slip and find myself falling back into patterns that don’t help me live to my full potential)
But the truth is—I didn’t get to the Eiffel tower, to spending weeks in Europe and having incredible relationships and experiences—by coming up with great excuses and justifications.
I worked on my shit.
I healed the places that were stuck, dark, angry and just plain icky.
We can’t get to our next “level” of growth and awareness if we are stuck in patterns that were responsible for getting us there in the first place.
Simply, we need to change if we want things to change. And it’s really not that hard.
Scary? Maybe a little.
But whats worse? Stretching to a new level and feeling some discomfort along the way—with the hope of creating new, great things in your life.
Or……playing it safe, staying where you are because it’s “a sure thing, ” safe or comfortable.
What feels better? What feels worse?
All it takes to live a life you really want—is to consciously know what it is you desire, write it down, nurture is like a tiny baby kitten and then get (and STAY) excited about that tiny baby kitten (which is the love, the travel, the experiences, the new home, the healed relationship with your mom)
You can’t expect to get to Paris, when your stuck in Wal-mart (no disrespect if you’re a Wal-Mart lover—it just creates a feeling of “lack of” whenever I have ventured in there)
You can’t expect to feel high energy and on top of the world, when your feelings and beliefs have you feeling buried.
You cant have a ton of $$ in your bank account when you FEEL broke.
You start the process of living an exquisite life by actually starting to live like you have one.
But how? How do you get from feeling mostly burnout to feeling beautiful?
You take baby steps and you are relentless about doing nothing other than working on feeling good, feeling better and being clear about your desires. You gotta know what it is you want first, then you gotta learn to be a vibrational match to that thing.
Then you sit back, chill-ax and know it’s coming (but you cant get irritated + annoyed if you think you’re not getting it when you want it…you can’t fall into that trap)
Most people won’t be able to jump from broke to billion, so you start one day at a time, choose your thoughts, feelings and actions to line up with your Eiffel tower—that thing that truly lights you up and that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy.
p.s. what’s your Eiffel tower? What’s that thing you want to conquest next? Let’s get on it! Share with me—I wanna know!
Carrie’s Top 10 List—The Big Kahunas (the things that have impacted my life on a grand + spectacular scale)
Commitment to awareness. This has to top my list, because without this in the lead—there wouldn’t be a list. I wouldn’t really think about it. I would be largely unaware of my life. In the past, I “lived” life asleep on so many levels. Asleep and numb to how I really felt, what I really wanted and what was truly possible. And when I made the choice to step into being committed to being aware (of my feelings, my thoughts, my reactions and the overall vibe of my life)—I began to get way more tuned into what truly mattered to me. Once you know what you truly desire—you are one step closer to receiving it.
Journaling. This should come as no surprise, being a writer and all. But I actually never really enjoyed journaling. For me, I preferred typing on a keyboard, which is such a familiar thing for me, given my background as a pianist. But a dear friend/mentor of mine, showed me just how beneficial journaling can be. There is a different mechanism that happens when we actually physically write over typing on a keyboard. It’s super satisfying and helps me wind down after a long day at the computer.
Books (shocker!). Aside from being a voracious writer, I am a voracious reader. I LOVE to read and at most times, have about 3 books going at the same time. The books that have had the biggest impact on me (of late)have been: A Course in Miracles (I struggled with this book in the past, because it read a bit like the bible, but if you stick with the workbook section and are ready for this sort of thing—I have found it miraculous) Abraham-Hicks books (any of them are good, or even just their daily quotes—they are the masters on the topic of energy and vibration)
Relationships. This last year, one of my biggest “A-HA’s” was just how critical it is for me to have healthy relationships. If there is something a bit off or unresolved in one of my primary relationships—it throws everything off its axis. And maybe this goes hand in hand with #1 on the list—that when you commit to awareness in your life—you can’t pretend or ignore when something is off and when the energy around it isn’t in alignment with what you want. If you work on healing and making peace with strained relationships—it spills into all the other areas of your life.
Nature. I need nature to feel grounded. It’s that simple. When I feel scattered, I simply go outside and sink my feet in the earth, or walk in the woods and it’s an instant game changer. Find that thing that can instantly change your mood from heavy to light.
Exercise/Health. This is another critical one for me and will most likely always have a place on my top 10 list. I have to exercise or I CLIMB WALLS. I also am a fan of supplements and eating in a way that honors what my body wants. I don’t follow any diets, or mainstream advice on what is healthy/not healthy. You can find just as many studies that prove one approach to health and diet is good—as you can find studies to show that it’s not. Bottom line—find out what feels in alignment with you. Always.
Creative outlet. For me, bringing things back into my life—like the piano and cooking— has been a great creative outlet. After a long day of writing—to create an amazing French meal is super relaxing.
Travel. I must have been a gypsy in a past life, because I MUST have a change of scenery periodically or I go bonkers. I love going to new place, discovering new foods, people, etc. It makes me feel alive.
Honoring what I love. This is what happens when you become committed to awareness. You discover more of what you really love and don’t love. Once you get to that point, the going backwards thing feels horrible. I love—candles, baths, good food, happy (but not fake happy) people, my kids, my dogs, my man, nature, nice clothes, travel, health, exercise, play, talking with God, creating, enjoying, luxury, flying first class, FRANCE and of course, everything on this list!
Solitude. This is a must have and a major epiphany for me this last year. I fought it because I associated wanting and needing good chunks of solitude as being—antisocial, introverted or like I was resisting something. That I needed to push through this and want to enjoy being in the company of others more often. Nope! My truth is that I require a certain amount of solitude to feel grounded and at my best, peak operating level.
So there you have it! I would encourage you, if you haven’t already to think over what your personal list may look like.
Because taking the time to do this (and writing it down) is a critical step in being aligned with what you want in life. You can go through life on autopilot (and if it works, then great!) or you can become very tuned into what it is you want, what you like and what makes you feel your best.
And when we feel our best—we are magnets attracting more of that goodness our way.
I am all about energy. You are all about energy (whether you believe it or not). Life is all about energy.
After years of trying to figure out how to manifest what I wanted (and boatloads of failures) what I realized is that I was trying to pretend my way into things, rather than actually feeling my way into them—authentically. And then there were other times, that I just wasn’t being conscious at all about how I was feeling. I just sort of letting my feelings run the show.
In other words, I was pretending to feel happy, successful, forgiving or joyful—when I really felt shitty, blameful, sad and annoyed.
Crap, that’s no fun.
I wasn’t fooling myself and I definitely wasn’t fooling the universe.
The world of manifesting (the idea that we attract back what we primarily give out) is a world of energy.
And you can’t trick the universe into believing that you are feeling something you aren’t. It doesn’t work that way.
The way it works is that you must first identify HOW IT IS THAT YOU WANT TO FEEL.
That is the starting point.
Most people stumble through life not really giving too much conscious thought to how it is they truly want to feel. We may think we do, but how many of us truly create a life based on a conscious awareness of how we want to feel minute to minute?
I am guessing that most people don’t give it much thought. Most of the time, we are actually just on autopilot with our feelings and are run by them, rather than being a conscious co creator with them.
Our feelings are the guide to our energy.
So, first you gotta—
- IDENTIFY HOW IT IS THAT YOU WANT TO FEEL
And once you understand how you want to feel, it’s time to—
- SORT OUT THE HOW-TO OF IT ALL
How do we work with our feelings (that sometimes feel so automatic and out of our ability to influence) when annoying shit is really happening?
I mean, how are we supposed to FEEL AMAZING, when there are so many things out there that seem to be working towards making us feel NOT AMAZING?
You gotta make a choice.
YOU MUST CHOOSE to stay committed to how you want to feel (beautiful, connected, loved, sensual, happy) in the face of life’s little mishaps and misfortunes.
This doesn’t mean you don’t acknowledge feeling annoyed by the justifiably annoying. It doesn’t mean ignoring the truth of how you feel.
It means saying “hey, I am annoyed, irritated, angry, etc…..and I know that staying in this state is NOT an energy I want to give out (or attract back to me) so I am going to acknowledge the truth of how I feel and let it go, because it’s not how I really want to feel.”
Then you go back to identifying HOW YOU WANT TO FEEL and create an arsenal of things you can do to get you right back into those desired feelings ASAP.
Maybe you can do some of these things to get back to your desired feelings—laugh, read a book you love, smile more, take a shower, go for a walk, sit under a tree, sing, dance, have a cup of your favorite tea, calla friend, breath more deeply, do some yoga, play with your dog, hug your kids, dream, light a candle, take a bath, eat some chocolate, scream in a pillow, cry, kiss, buy some flowers, remember something that makes you smile and laugh.
Create your own quick-list of things that you can do—lickety-split—to get out of a funk and back towards fantastic . . . or just a bit better even.
Your energy is amazing. It’s powerful and it’s a choice. Your energy is amazing because it’s the secret sauce of your life. Your energy is amazing because it directs the flow of your life. That flow can be a good one, or it can be turbulent. But it’s all a choice.
Choose to feel, think and be the sort of person that you enjoy being around. And then watch the miracles start to unfold.
For my readers who don’t know, I just made a massive move from Oregon to South Carolina.
And for those of you who also may not know—it was a monumental deal.
Phew………like a serious massive deal. Yowza.
I am not at all afraid of change. In fact, I would say I am one of those people who require change in my life, or I get bored (and then I get feisty).
But this move wasn’t just a geographical move. It was a spiritual, next phase, evolution, growth and big leap move.
It was a move that stretched me to ask the bigger questions, to get more in tune and connected with my desires and to really get clear about why I am here and what I am doing.
You see, you don’t get to where you want to go (at times) without a bit of stretching—without a bit of fear, discomfort and YOWZA.
I am not saying it is required to feel crappy in order to feel good or to reach a new goal or intention in life, but there are times that the contrast we feel when we are going through big changes, won’t feel so amazing.
In fact, it may be a stretch to keep going.
But in hindsight, all the things that came my way, were things I asked for!
I asked for a change, I asked for my next growth phase. I asked and then I received and then . . . . I kicked and screamed a little bit. It wasn’t until I surrendered and just moved forward in faith, that the miracles started showing up.
What I know and what was confirmed to me in facing this challenge, was that we are all so awesome. And that we all have everything we need to face any challenge that comes our way.
We are gifted life. We are given opportunities to see the truth or we can choose to give into illusions.
The illusion is that you are weak, you aren’t good enough and you can’t do it.
The illusion is that you don’t have 100%, full on 24/7 support.
That is the illusion.
The truth is that you can do it.
The truth is that you DO KNOW (so stop telling yourself you don’t).
The truth is that you are loved. The truth is that you can live your desires from a most magical and miraculous place (I am living proof).
The only thing that limits you, is a choice you make to believe your limitations + illusions.
You are awesome. You are light. You are love.
You are a little bit superwoman.
That is the truth.
Do you sometimes think you are getting clues, messages and signs from the universe, but then doubt yourself and think you’re just acting crazy, or have an overactive imagination?
Are there times that you find yourself scratching your head a bit and wondering . . .
Did I really feel that persons angry energy, or am I imagining it?
Did I just see the number 2:22, right after I asked God (spirit, or whatever word you use) for a sign?
Am I crazy, or did that song come on the radio right as I was thinking about it?
Did I just see an owl fly right in front of me in broad daylight?
Sometimes what most people may see as mere coincidence, to others are clear signs from the universe.
Whether you believe it or not—we all have guides (unseen to most) that are with us throughout our lives.
And our ability to relate and “hear” them depends on our willingness to accept they exist.
Simply, if you don’t believe, you probably won’t see things as signs or messages, but rather you will just see them as mere coincidence and brush it off.
But for those of us who do believe and who do want to facilitate a stronger, more clear relationship with our guides,…..How do we know when we are actually getting signs or if it’s just our imagination?
I guess there isn’t any 100% fool proof way to know the difference, but there are a few tips.
There are 3 ways I know I am getting a clear, direct message from my guides:
- I asked for it! I know its a sign when I have asked my guides for clear direction + then things start popping. The timing is uncanny and the signs are strong. For example, a personal issue that recently came up in my life was that my husband needed to move cross country for his job. I resisted going on EVERY level and it caused incredible discomfort, I finally saw there was a growth opportunity in it, released my attachment to it and asked my guides for help. What unfolded after that was sign after sign after sign. Everything just unfolded easefully for us to make this move. I knew this was my answer.
- It feels real, as opposed to fabricated. I don’t know how else to describe this, other than it just feels authentic. Another example—In the heat of this move and all the emotions that were surrounding it, I was walking through my house and low and behold there was a snake slithering across the floor. NEVER in my 16 years living in this town or this house, have I ever seen a snake indoors. Snake, in animal totem books carries the message of change and clearing old energy. Again, very clear sign.
- Numbers and nature. For me, one way I am very clear I am on track or getting clear signs rather than imagining things—are numbers. I have a very strong spiritual connection to numbers (and animals) and when I am in the zone, or simply dealing with a big life challenge, I get guidance in the form of numbers. For example, the book I wrote, just happened to end on page 222—a very spiritually driven number. Nature is another very clear way that I know I am receiving clear signs. I feel the most connected when I am nature and always know this is where I can get clear signs.
These things may show up different for you. It could be a certain animal showing up repeatedly, a song, or a recurring dream.
But the key thing is when you get more tuned in (through meditation, or just being grounded) the signs come through more clearly.
The key is . . .. to be open to receiving. Be open, surrender and breathe. If you desire this connection and nurture it, you will grow better and better at reading and interpreting the signs.
And does it really matter if it’s a sign or your imagination if it helps you? After all, most incredible things in life, begin with imagining it first.
Much love and enjoy,
ps. And as I looked up at the clock after typing my last word . . . the time was 10:10! Perfect.