—Neale Donald Walsch
There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.—Buddha
I’ve stared at this screen at least 5 times in the last few weeks or so . . . . just feeling sort of blank. Not like me—at all.
And then I got to thinking about it . . .
Sometimes you just have to start.
Even though you may not feel a massive influx of creative energy or motivation to get going on something—sometimes you have to just start.
- I’m not in my creative zone
- I don’t have time
- It’s not good enough
- I shouldn’t do it if it doesn’t feel good (faulty self-help belief. See my article on this here)
- Meh. I just dont want to. So . . . eff it, I’m not going to do it (similar to the not wanting to do it because it doesn’t feel good, but more rebellious in nature. If you want a super interesting read about our personality tendencies read Gretchen Rubins book Better than Before, take her quiz and let me know what you are!)
- I don’t know how, so I just won’t try
How can you tell the difference?
You tell the difference by getting dialed in about how you feel. You journal about it, you slow down and get centered and then you ask.
If you think it’s something you want, but are starting to notice a pattern of excuses why you can’t—then it’s probably a form of avoidance that’s holding you back.
But what if it really IS about not having enough time?
It’s seldom ONLY about time. If something matters—you can find the time. If you are interested in a unique take on the concept of time, I would highly recommend reading Gary Zukavs book The Big Leap and diving into the section on Einstein time vs. Newtonian time. Life changer.
If you feel a gentle (or not so gentle) nudge or voice telling you to do that thing, start that book, eat healthier food, clean out your office, have that difficult conversation, take that trip—just start.
Maybe starting is committing to writing 15 minutes a day when you wake up. Even if it’s just scribble—
And then you see what happens.
Maybe it’s clearing the energy in your home by doing a deep clean, instead of watching TV every night.
It’s just starting. And then it’s getting in the habit of discerning your true desires from distracting busy work and distracting time sucking activities.
One of my favorite quotes is—”If not now, then when?”
This is especially poignant to me now, just finding out that my biological father passed away last week. We never met in person, but I really would have liked to.
So there’s a little heaviness in my energy and a sense of something being unfinished. And a new depth to that quote about . . . if not now, then when?
If we don’t choose to go after things that matter—like they truly do matter—then in a moment, they can slip away.
I’ll never be able to meet my biological dad in person, but I can use this experience to live my life more fully each day.
To just start those things I know my soul is leading me towards. Even if it scares me. Even if I feel I don’t have time. Even if I don’t feel like it.
Because sometimes it’s in the very small act of just taking one step forward, that entire new possibilities open.
I can choose to see his passing as a reminder to live my life even MORE fully each and every day.
To submit that article. To write that next book. To take time to be with those I love every day. To travel more. To practice speaking French more often.
To say yes to that speaking event (shit, yes, I did) and to just start.
I knew I wanted to reach out and write to you all—but I couldn’t find my voice.
And then I just sat down and started writing and the message was clear—just start.
p.s. For those of you who work online quite a bit . . . I use these two apps to limit distractions/track time online when I am in work/create mode—Freedom and RescueTime. These apps keep you really honest about how much time you are spending online, blocks certain websites and allows you to track and monitor exactly what you’re doing. Life changers . . . if you like that sort of thing!
The self-help industry rakes in over 10 billion dollars a year.
Needless to say, it’s a pretty big deal. And since you are here—I am guessing it’s an interest of yours as well.
Maybe you can relate to wanting to be happier and more spiritually connected. Maybe you simply want to learn how to procrastinate less, or be healthier. Maybe you want to learn about manifesting.
Whatever the reason is for you—it’s a good thing!! I am happy that you want to live the best life you can live and be the best version of you that you can be.
And as with anything in life—there are the good and not so good things that go along with the self-help world.
Some of the biggest issues with the help world are—
- People use it as a crutch and don’t actually make the changes they read or learn about. They just get lost on the self-help treadmill and don’t reach their goals or intentions.
- People give up when it gets hard and therefore assume it doesn’t work—blaming the content and the messenger, rather than taking personal accountability.
- There are online gurus, teachers and coaches that really aren’t out for their customers best interests. In other words, there are quacks and charlatans in the self-help world—ABSOLUTELY.
- People become enamored with self-help gurus, and give their power away, rather than using what they learn to cultivate and grow their own power and knowing. After all—it is called “self-help” not “guru-help.” In the end, you have to CHOOSE to use the information you are taking in, to actually create the desired changes or shifts in your life.
- There is bad information in the self-help world or information that may not be best suited for your specific personality or needs. It’s wise to be discerning about exactly what it is you want and choose your sources with that in mind.
This message comes across as almost shaming to people that work a 9 to 5 job, or that aren’t willing to sell all their possessions, travel the world and give everything to their dreams. It’s this idea that we are copping out on our true souls calling by not putting it ALL on the line and going for it.
And I call b.s.
As Elizabeth Gilbert states—
“For the first ten years of my creative journey, I did not make a single dime out of writing. And for the next ten years of my creative journey (which included the publication of three books) I always kept alternative day jobs — always made sure I had other streams of income to rely upon. I did not quit all my other jobs until EAT PRAY LOVE became a crazy bestseller, you guys. And EAT PRAY LOVE was a freak of nature.
The reason I always maintained other streams of income was because I never wanted to burden my creativity with the task of providing for me in the material world.”
(If you don’t know who Elizabeth Gilbert is, heres a link to her FB page and the full post)
It’s ok to keep the day job while your building your health coaching business on the side.
It’s ok to work odd jobs here and there while your writing your book—so you can pay the bills (oh, and eat ; ) It’s ok to work at a job that you may not necessarily LOVE, but that gives you a certain degree of security, so that you can really pour your SOUL into that passion of yours.
A passion can quickly turn to a burden if we are losing sleep about how our passion will pay our bills. A passion can quickly turn to a bummer if it’s the only way to pay rent.
There’s no shame in pursuing your dreams and passions part time.
There’s no shame in loving your 9 to 5 and choosing security with a little sacrifice.
And it’s also ok to quit the job you don’t love—and go for it. It’s ok to dream even bigger dreams, challenge yourself and push yourself out of your comfort zone in order to realize your dreams.
You get to choose what’s a better fit for you—that’s the beauty (and sometimes, the burden) of living an aware, energetically rich life. Your ability to choose how you want to spend your time—is a gift and ultimately, the very thing that helps you create a life you truly love.
Much love and happy Monday!
What will you choose to create, feel, do, focus on this week? Just the small act of being more aware of what you are choosing, is huge step in living a life that lights you up.
Just because we “get” something intellectually doesn’t mean we truly believe it or think it’s possible for us.
And even if we get it intellectually, AND believe it—sometimes we forget to practice it or implement into our lives.
Can you relate?
I was reminded of this very glaringly this weekend when I returned from a life changing trip to San Diego.
This trip was a reunion with some very powerful women. Women who are movers and shakers in their careers, families, communities and spiritual lives.
We laughed, cried, journaled, set powerful intentions and generally fit about 2 years of deep personal work in 4 days.
In a nutshell—we moved some mountains.
But I didn’t realize how truly transformational it was until I got home and started seeing the power of intention already working miracles in my life.
And not just my life—but those closest to me as well.
I won’t get into the nitty- gritty of the miracles that unfolded, but suffice to say that it was a massive, miraculous shift : )
The powerful intentions I set while in San Diego had already begun shifting things in a matter of days.
So what the heck is an intention and how can you get moving on it so YOU can move a few mountains yourself (or at the very least create change)?
A standard, text book definition of an intention is this—
- A thing intended; an aim or plan.
But a more fitting definition from a manifesting perspective would be—
- An intention is a desire, dream or goal that you passionately envision creating in your life. It’s something that you may not physically see evidence of right now, but through creating a detailed vision about what you want—you create an energy which open doors to making it real. It’s the process of turning a dream into reality.
For example—it’s creating a “day-dream” or written statment about what your soul mate is like—right down to every last detail. What color is his hair? What clothes is he wearing when you first meet him? Color of his eyes? The tone of his voice. The way you feel when he looks at you.
It can be a written story or internal vision you create about all the wealth you have—even though your checking account says otherwise.
It’s confidence in knowing what you want is on it’s way—even though you may not see evidence of it.
But how do you get yourself to feel something or envision something so clearly when it feels forced, faked or fabricated?
Here are a few things that you can implement right away that can help you with this—
- First off—change the perspective on it being fake, forced or fabricated. Have fun with it and approach it with a youthful, curious mindset. Do young kids feel bad about daydreaming? Be a kid about it. Dream away.
- See it as a gift—you have creative control in your life and can have a HUGE impact on what happens by choosing to focus on what you want, rather than seeing what you don’t want (advanced manifesting topic which I will cover in an upcoming mini course)
- Place the focus on what it feels like to ALREADY HAVE that thing in your life. Stay with that feeling.
Intentionsetting also has an element of letting go which is critical to getting the results you want.
Many people are actually better at this than they think, but they have unconscious, self sabotaging energy and beliefs that chase away the dream that showed up for them (more on this in the next broadcast : )
Intention setting—when done right—is another powerful tool in your arsenal for living a good life.
And who doesn’t want to have a life where you actually get to live your dreams, rather than just dreaming them?
It’s even better than moving mountains.
Your turn now. What’s your relationship with intention setting? Is it something you’re doing? A little, a lot, not at all? I’d love to know.
The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page.
I love to travel. I REALLY love to travel.
My first “big” travel experience was to the south of France when I was 16 years old. It was a high school foreign exchange program that was offered through my French class. When my teacher announced the trip—I couldn’t raise my hand fast enough or fill out the forms soon enough.
What is it about taking a trip that changes us?
What is it about being in a new place, where a different language is spoken, different foods are eaten and different traditions are observed that is so incredible?
I think it can be different things, for different people, but generally, I think traveling has the ability to change us (in good ways) because it—
- Opens our minds to new things, new foods, new ways of living and new experiences.
- Helps us to more clearly identify what we like and don’t like in life.
- Helps break down cultural barriers or preconceived stereotypes about different cultures, people or lifestyles.
And these things matter now more than EVER right now.
We are in an intense time right now. There is a lot of dark energy that is begging to be healed, shed and shifted.
In this time when there are things happening in our country and world that can divide us and fill us with so much fear that we never want to leave our homes—it’s more important than ever to find a way to bring peace back into our hearts and let love rule over fear.
Many of my friends and family asked if I was nervous about traveling to France right now with all the recent terrorists attacks and my answer was NO.
I won’t let dark energy win over the light.
And in less “woo-woo” words—I won’t stop doing what I love because of other peoples actions. I won’t stop living. I won’t hide.
And I most definitely won’t let hatred win.
If there is any kind of war worth fighting right now—it’s the war of our thoughts, beliefs and energy.
Fight to feel good, to be a beacon of love and to travel ANYWHERE your heart desires.
How does traveling change us? It gives us the opportunity to see the world more clearly. It can help us to be more understanding, more forgiving and less judgmental. It can open our eyes, our minds and our hearts.
And as always—those things are choices—our choices.
Let’s choose wisely.
p.s. Interested in learning more specific ways that traveling is good for us? Check out this in depth article in Positive Health Wellness about the direct link between our health and traveling.
The idea is—that when you line up you energy with what you desire in life and make a conscious effort to consistently keep your energy aligned with those things—they will appear in your life (manifest).
- You punch back(not literally of course!)—you react off the cuff and say something that may, momentarily give you a sense of relief (p.s. this never works)
- You pretend it didn’t hurt and self medicate with alcohol, food, shopping or other such feeling stuffing activities. Or my favorite . . . . saying “I’m fine” (when you really feel like crying, screaming or curling up in a corner)
- You allow the feelings. You sit with it and accept it. Then you kindly ask that voice what it wants. You hear it out. And then you let it know it isn’t running the show. Then—you tell the truth about it all—that you are loved and the universe always has your back.
And whether you’re highly sensitive or not—it takes patience, understanding and personal strength to stay present in the moment when someone is saying something that feels hurtful or unconscious to you and listen in a non defensive way.
The truth of who we are is light, love and brilliance. And no matter how many layers of wounds and misdirected inner voices we have to REDIRECT—we can always find our way back to what’s true. Always.
I used to be a very opinionated, argumentative tree hugger type (not to stereotype or anything; )
I didn’t understand how to be passionate about something and not have a chip on my shoulder about it when others didn’t have the same viewpoint.
I couldn’t understand why people could be so ignorant and asleep, to what I then saw as the demise of our environment, the abuse of animals and the general uncaring attitude that people had towards things that seemed of the utmost importance to me.
I was reminded of this recently when my daughter came home from a 2 month long trip to Sri Lanka and Nepal.
She is worried about the planet. She doesn’t understand why we don’t all drink out of hemp bottles. She is frustrated and angered by people that just don’t seem to care. She thinks Trump is the antichrist.
I get it. I understand. I know what it feels like to be so passionate and emotionally invested in something that it drives you nuts seeing other people not care at all about it.
But here’s the deal (from an energetic, manifesting perspective)—
It doesn’t matter if it’s the Donald Trump supporters (or haters), the tree huggers or the Bernie Sanders lovers.
It doesn’t matter if it’s fear about terrorists (so we never leave our homes) or fear of the polar ice caps melting.
If you’re arguing, pushing, worrying and PRIMARILY placing your focus on the “WHAT’S WRONG” part of anything—you’re setting yourself up for more disappointment and more things to worry about.
You don’t get a clean, healthy planet by being PRIMARILY angry and pissed off by people who have 18 kids, drive SUV’s or don’t recycle.
You get a clean, vibrant planet by seeing it as a thriving, healthy thing (yep, even when all evidence points to it being otherwise).
Yes, there are times when anger and fierce passion about causes and injustices have created great changes and shifts in things—but I can guarantee, the focus didn’t stay long on the anger and disgust, but shifted quickly to a passion and drive to create a solution (and that feels better)
Whether it’s people freaking out about who our next president is going to be or worrying about the fate of our planet—we’ve got to understand how critical it is to keep the focus + energy on HOW WE WOULD LIKE IT TO BE.
Even when we see evidence of things we don’t want (litter, mean people, presidential candidates we don’t like, polar bears balancing on a tiny, thin piece of ice, etc..) the key is to keep the focus on what’s wanted, work in a positive way towards that goal and then let go a little.
Yep . . . .let go a little. Because if we hold on soooooo tightly to what we want—energetically speaking—it comes across as an energy of desperation, rather than desire. And that isn’t how we attract things we want—by being desperate or fanatical.
I know its a HUGE energetic leap of faith for most of us (to let go and keep the focus on what’s wanted rather than what’s perceived)—but it’s the most critical part of the energy/vibration/manifesting deal.
So just for today—whatever chip you may have on your shoulder about whatever topic you feel passionate about—try seeing it from another angle.
Try letting go of the darkness of it and allowing the light to be with it—transforming it into a knowing that no matter what—it’s all good.
Because whether you’re a tree hugger, or a Trump lover—you won’t get closer to what you want by being angry about it all the time, or by trying to get everyone else to think the way you do.
Do your thing. Be passionate. And of course, care what you care about.
Just don’t let the evidence of what’s wrong, what’s broken, what bugs you, what you want to change, what makes you seething mad, what makes you disappointed in humanity—throw you off course and block you from enjoying life.
Keep the focus on the desire, not the disappointment.
And do it from a place of light, of forgiveness, of hope and of positive expectancy.
p.s If you’re looking for an entry level way to work with me, learn more about your energy, how it impacts your life + how to create what you want by learning to master your choices and your energy, CLICK HERE.
If you haven’t noticed already, the “choice” thing is something I cover quite a bit.
It’s not just because I wrote a book about it. And It’s not just because I like talking about the same thing over and over again.
I talk, coach and teach about the power of choice—because it’s the #1 thing that can transform your life with the least amount of effort, struggle or frustration.
Once you learn what exactly to do with the power of choice—manifesting what you want gets a whole lot easier and more enjoyable.
And the super quickie manifesting 101 lesson is this—manifesting is nothing more than matching your energy (thoughts and feelings) to what you want.
It’s having healthy feelings about money, wealth and prosperity—if you want more prosperity.
It’s about having good feelings and thoughts about your body—if you want a healthy body.
Getting what you want (manifesting) is nothing more than CHOOSING WHAT TO THINK AND FEEL and holding that consistently and truthfully.
Let me ask you a couple questions . . .
When was the last time someone forced you to feel a certain way?
When was the last time someone forced you to think a certain thought?
The answer is never!
We may think someone makes us feel and think a certain way—but the 100% truth (and yes, sometimes the truth hurts a little) is that WE are the ones responsible for what we think and how we feel.
And what we think and feel are choices—that are either moving us closer to more travel, a rockin’ healthy body and our soulmate finding us. Or not.
So this awareness will either make you 1. Giddy, excited, thrilled to know you have a certain degree of control (although I don’t like that word) over certain things in your life or 2. Freaked out to know that you have a certain degree of control over how things go in your life.
When this idea truly sinks in for people and when they truly grasp how much power they have when they become accountable to what they think and how they feel—this is when things get fun.
It’s when doors open, magic happens and lives are transformed.
And thats not to say there won’t be ANY uncomfortableness along your path to creating your dreams, desires and goals. But the whole “no pain, no gain” thing—is not required when you want to shift something in your life.
Sometimes when we are learning to THINK AND FEEL differently about money, health, work (any topic really) —we need to put a bit more effort into replacing beliefs and feelings that DON’T SERVE WHAT WE WANT and replace them with thoughts and feelings that do.
Simple? YES. Easy? Not always.
But what I tell my clients who are really determined and ready for a big change is this—
- you won’t get there unless you’re clear about what you want
- you won’t get there if you’re wishy-washy with your energy
- you won’t get there by focusing on what you DON’T want (the key to manifesting is to put the primary focus on what’s wanted, not what’s missing)
- you definitely won’t get there by staying stuck in your old story about your life, your problems and your “lack of” (whether is be money, love, health, happiness) In other words, it may be 100% true, real and painful for you to recall and talk about your past and how it impacts your ability to be positive—but that is a story that you are choosing to repeat. The question is . . . how is it serving you in getting what you want in life?
If you simply remember and practice these key points—you’ll have the ability to change almost anything you want.
You can attract more peace with your energy.
You can attract more love with your energy.
You can attract more health, wealth and happiness with your energy.
And yep . . . it’s absolutely your choice.
I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly.
Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why are we so quick so self-criticize and so slow to give ourselves a break? What beliefs have we learned that cause us to keep repeating this pattern of being hard on ourselves? They aren’t beliefs that you want to hang onto if you plan on creating a life you love.
Because an energy of being hard on yourself, is not an energy of allowing.
If you’ve been with me for any time at all—then you know I am all about the power of choice. And using that power to help us live better lives—live that are beautiful and energetically RICH. And “better” is really something that we have to define on our own terms, right? What does a better life mean to you? More time with your family + friends? More travel? More money? Better health? A more satisfying career? What is it for you? I know it seems like a little thing, but it’s often the little things that have the biggest impact on our lives. So for today, think about what would make life better for you. And then think about all the ways you may beat yourself up a little bit for not having those things. Maybe you want to drop 10 pounds and feel more healthy—but you can’t seem to find the time to make it to the gym and the ice cream seems to have some sort of evil spell on you—so you beat yourself up for not doing it “better.” Being hard on yourself about eating the ice cream, or not making it the gym—isn’t going to help you get closer to what you want. Instead of getting yourself into a tizzy about it try to— Let go of feeling like you aren’t doing it right.
But if not, don’t beat yourself up about it. Change your energy about it—or go. If you want to have a life that truly FEELS better to you, then you gotta start with not beating yourself up for not being where you want to be. You get where you want to be—faster and with much less struggle—by being easy on yourself and choosing things that support your bigger visions. And baby step by baby step, bit by bit—you’ll get there. And then once you’re there—you’ll discover new, exciting crazy new adventures you want to add to your list. The overall gist?
Enjoy the journey. And be easy on yourself along the way.
Big blessings, Carrie