Give Yourself a Break!

I am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly.

~Buckminster Fuller

Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why are we so quick so self-criticize and so slow to give ourselves a break? What beliefs have we learned that cause us to keep repeating this pattern of being hard on ourselves? They aren’t beliefs that you want to hang onto if you plan on creating a life you love.

Because an energy of being hard on yourself, is not an energy of allowing.

If you’ve been with me for any time at all—then you know I am all about the power of choice. And using that power to help us live better lives—live that are beautiful and energetically RICH. And “better” is really something that we have to define on our own terms, right? What does a better life mean to you? More time with your family + friends? More travel? More money? Better health? A more satisfying career? What is it for you? I know it seems like a little thing, but it’s often the little things that have the biggest impact on our lives. So for today, think about what would make life better for you.  And then think about all the ways you may beat yourself up a little bit for not having those things. Maybe you want to drop 10 pounds and feel more healthy—but you can’t seem to find the time to make it to the gym and the ice cream seems to have some sort of evil spell on you—so you beat yourself up for not doing it “better.” Being hard on yourself about eating the ice cream, or not making it the gym—isn’t going to help you get closer to what you want. Instead of getting yourself into a tizzy about it try to— Let go of feeling like you aren’t doing it right.

Let go of the guilt and the shoulds, woulds and coulds.
 
Eat the ice cream without guilt. Find time to go to the gym—or not.

But if not, don’t beat yourself up about it. Change your energy about it—or go. If you want to have a life that truly FEELS better to you, then you gotta start with not beating yourself up for not being where you want to be. You get where you want to be—faster and with much less struggle—by being easy on yourself and choosing things that support your bigger visions. And baby step by baby step, bit by bit—you’ll get there. And then once you’re there—you’ll discover new, exciting crazy new adventures you want to add to your list. The overall gist?

Enjoy the journey. And be easy on yourself along the way.

Big blessings, Carrie

The Problem with Being “Authentic”

Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise.

—Sigmund Freud

I bet if you’re human and breathing—you’ve run across another human that in all their authenticity—triggered you a little. 

Or maybe a lot. 

It’s ok. It doesn’t mean you’re horrible and lack compassion. 

It also doesn’t mean that you’re wrong in feeling like that persons version of  “authentic” would be better if it were, well—LESS authentic.

You hear it over and over again in the self help and personal growth world . . . 

Find your authentic self. Be your authentic self. Know your authentic self.” 

But here is the issue with that—

Some people’s version of “authentic” may not seem very nice and may miss the boat when it comes to being self aware and open to change. And even if people do honestly feel they are being their 100% authentic self—you still may not line up with it. 

And that’s ok too!  You don’t have to agree with everyone—to be evolved or spiritual. 

​​​​​​​You don’t even have to like everyone to be evolved + spiritual (shhh  . . . don’t tell the Dalai Lama)

​​​​​​​In fact, it’s more spiritual to be honest about NOT feeling super jazzed about someone, than it is to pretend otherwise. 

Because often in our acceptance of those feelings that don’t feel so evolved—is where the magic and growth take place. 

On top of that—is the idea that what you resist persists. In other words, if you are truly bothered by something but pretending you aren’t bothered by it—it’s not going to go away, because you are “feeling stuffing” which is basically resistance. 

And resistance, feeling stuffing and pretending you don’t feel something, that you do—is not an energy of allowing and attracting. 

This matters because how we truly feel about things—is our vibration. And our vibration is what determines what flows back into our lives.  

And you can’t change it, heal it or fix it if you aren’t being honest about it.  

Many people think they are being authentic, when they really aren’t fully connected to how they feel about something and ultimately, to their vibration about it. 

So what does it mean to be authentic in a conscious way? A way that isn’t self righteous, evasive or fake?

It means—

  • owning your shit
  • saying what you really mean
  • standing up for what you really want
  • being accountable (a nicer way of saying “owning your shit”)
  • being committed to your growth
  • being ok with making mistakes, but learning form them rather than repeating them for decades and then passing that energy on to your kids
  • letting go of a need to be right
  • being of service to brining more light and love to the world (I know, this is the super woo-woo one, but hey—I go there and that’s just me being authentically me 😉
  • being conscious and self-aware

If a more “true” and less self-helpy meaning of authenticity is being an example of goodness, of light, of forgiveness and truth—then that’s a keeper.  

But if it simply gets reduced to another woo-woo term that causes frustration or annoyance—then by all means—it’s time to drop it and move on. 

The main point is to not let the word, teaching or concept get in the way of the main intention and goal. 

And isn’t our ultimate goal simply to enjoy our lives? To laugh more, play more, travel more, love more, feel healthy, frisky and ALIVE? 

Yes!  Truthfully, authentically—YES! 

Big Blessings,

Carrie